No one gets married with the intent of getting divorced…I take that back. Leanna and Garrison, the characters in my latest novel, “Up in Smoke” do. And actually, I’ve heard stories of other couples that have done the same thing. Crazy, right?
But, for the most part, I’d say it’s safe to say that MOST couples never intend to divorce. However, nearly 50% of couples will divorce.
Ugh.
It breaks my heart.
It seems everywhere I turn, marriages are falling a part…even the couples in our church are being struck down. Why? Why is this happening? I get that things happen, people make choices, and sometimes choices are made for us against our will.
I’m tapping my pencil, clicking my tongue, wracking my brain trying to grasp why so many marriages are going up in smoke…here’s what I’ve come up with…
1: Transparency
As a society we tend to act like we’re okay when we’re not. Marriage is hard, and it’s okay to admit that, and it’s okay to get help, and glean from the wisdom of others.
2: Sanctity
Perhaps as a society we don’t understand the sanctity of marriage…it’s holiness. It’s a God ordained institution…a ’til death do us part deal. It’s worth our attention, our devotion, our time, energy, and our priority.
3: Purpose
Maybe we don’t understand the purpose of marriage. There’s an end goal, a goal that reaches past our life and into the generations to come. Marriage is a reflection of God’s love for us, and it also serves a safe, strong environment to raise up children. Our actions, good and bad, will be seen for years to come…we are a product of our ancestors, and we have a job to raise up the next generation teaching them about God, and showing them what relationships are meant to be.
I can analyze why marriages are struggling, but that doesn’t help us know HOW to stay together. HOW do we do ’til death do us part and not do it in misery?
1: Be transparent: plug in to a church or solid group of friends; share and care for each other
2: Realize the sanctity of marriage; care for your marriage; protect it; go on dates; make each other a priority
3: Realize marriage has a purpose; it’s worth the ups and downs; it means something that we can’t even really begin to grasp; it’s purpose reaches into the generations…we shape the future with our marriages.
I’d love to hear your thoughts, advice on this topic. 🙂 Any ways you have made your marriage stronger? Need us to pray for your marriage? Let us know. 🙂